Sunday, February 29, 2004

OK, so I was struck with a crippling case of HTML A.D.D. again. I still feel like there is something missing with this layout, but as I never seem to really "finish" them, I will just say this isn't done yet (like I always do) and then get bored with it and start working on another half-done layout.

The scoop behind this one is just that I had never done a band-inspired layout. In fact, my closest tribute to any sort of media character was the oh-how-pink Jenna Jameson layout. Anyway, I just love Jane's Addiction more every time I listen to them and I will admit I find Perry Farrell (despite the fact that he is skinny, middle-aged, has a huge nose and is a former heroin junkie) unbelievable hot. Mmm-mmm-good. I never said I was "normal."

I really hope to get some new content up in this biatch before I get bored with it and put something else up, so watch for that but please don't hound me. I reserve the right (as always) to slack off. :o)

Hope everyone had a lovely weekend.

P.S. I am a skittle.
You're Skittles!!! You have a very interesting
personality, you're so unique. You're the kind
of person who always thinks outside of the box.
You're also a very accepting individual, and
believe in inner beauty.

Which kind of candy are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Posted @ 12:55 PM

Monday, February 23, 2004

Ever been so tired that you think one thing but say something else, or you just can't "spit it out" at all? Well, I am at the end of one of those days. Halleluia! (Or however you spell it!)

I have been having these lucid dreams lately, where I am awake and looking around the room, but seeing things that aren't really there, and so I wake Jay up to ask he sees it too (before I am awake enough to realize I am dreaming) and then we are both up. Yes folks, you are reading the blog of a crazy person. Last nite it was red light coming from the closet. Last week it was something dripping on us from the ceiling. Sometimes I swear I hear someone talking in the condo. And because I refuse to believe we have a ghost, and because these things all miraculously disappear when I wake up (at least mostly awake), I blame it in lucid dreaming. I just wish I knew what to do so I could let go and just fucking SLEEP. I am so tired. And with these things waking me up multiple times a nite, I never get rested. :o( My usual dose of generic Benadryl (same exact ingredient and dosage as Nytol or Sominex, but for a shitload less $$) is not cutting it lately. I was a raging insomniac for many years, and developed...well, I wouldn't call it a really bad dependency, but it wasn't healthy...a socially acceptable drug habit, I guess you could call it...on various concoctions of pills (both prescription and over-the-counter), just to get a few hours of rest. Somehow I broke that habit and taught myself to sleep again. So when I have stretches of bad sleep, it makes me afraid that I am going there again, into that place of staring at the ceiling in the middle of the nite, just waiting for it to be morning. I hate it. I never want to do it again...

Anyway, it appears that all I need to blog is to be totally deliriously tired. What a fucking catch 22. Blogging, but look how I had to get inspired. Lol.

Sweet dreams everyone. (Including me.)

Posted @ 7:53 PM

Friday, February 20, 2004

Yay, the Friday Five.
When was the last time you...
1. ...went to the doctor? January 16th, for the neverending sinus infection (which, by the way, is still bugging me a little, but not enough to go back to the doc!)
2. ...went to the dentist? Some time before my 18th birthday, when I was still covered under my parents' insurance. I am pushing 26, so it's been a good 8 years... Yes, I know this is bad. If you want to squawk at me about it, be prepared to offer me the money to go to the dentist!
3. ...filled your gas tank? This morning. I drive about 90 miles a day, so I fill it often.
4. enough sleep? Heh. That's funny. I never get enough sleep. I am plagued with waking up a bazillion times a nite. Always have been.
5. ...backed up your computer? Heh. Um, what's backing up? Hate to admit, never. I am not terribly attached to anything on my computer.

Perhaps I will write more this weekend, but I am at work and should go do something work-like. Hope everyone has a lovely day. :o)

Posted @ 9:03 AM

Wednesday, February 18, 2004

So what am I doing on my day off? Shitloads of laundry! Well, I only have enough quarters for 7 loads, but if I overstuff, that should almost finish it. I know this is nasty, but we all have our quirks and Jay had 2 trashbags of dirty clothes he brought when he moved in here in December and we have both been avoiding it. He had no laundry facilities at his last place and I can tell you from experience, it gets out of control fast if you actually have to drive somewhere to take care of it. So today I am determined to wash every dirty thing in the condo. It's a big job, but somebody's gotta do it...

I owe a few people an explanation regarding "Crazy Pigeon Eyes" and now that I have sat down to do so, I am not sure how to explain it... Well, for starters, when Tracy Morgan was on Saturday Night Live, he has this skit called "Brian Fellow's Safari Planet" that was some of the funniest shit I ever saw. They had their little theme song along with an announcer who said, "Brian Fellow is not an accredited zoologist, nor does he hold an advanced degree in any of the environmental sciences. He is simply an enthusiastic young man with a 6th Grade education and an abiding love for all of God's creatures." Anyway, this was one of the friggin funniest SNL characters EVER and there was one episode where he had a guest zoologist who brought a pigeon and at some point during the interview, he said something along the lines of, "That bird's got crazy pigeon eyes!" and I almost pissed myself laughing. Then the station I listen to in the morning started playing the CPE clip after news stories about nutty people. I told Dr. D about it and it has become a sort of battle cry when we have a loopy client coming in. Jay and I use it, too. Not in front of the person with the CPEs, of course. But any time anyone is being crazy, it applies. If you have the means of locating and watching any past SNL episode with a Safari Planet sketch in it, I recommend it whole-heartedly. I am actually in the process of designing a CPE logo to make T-shirts on I know it's more of a private joke, but it's a damn good one. At least I think so. Who knows? Maybe I will start a fad and make my first million. ;o) Safari Planet clips here.

I am out of things to say. Hope everyone has a very happy Hump Day!

Posted @ 9:42 AM

Friday, February 13, 2004

Oooooh, how appropriate on Friday the 13th! Been awhile since I have done the Friday Five, but I have today off and am hence not rushing out to go do anything, so I thought I'd sit my ass down for a few minutes and give y'all some reading material. (NOTE: That is said half-jokingly. I don't expect many people read my blah blah, but to those who do, thank you!)

1. Are you superstitious? Nah, not really. I am really more into intuition. I won't not go on a trip because the stars all lined up in the shape of a demon pig or any shit like that, but if I get a bad feeling...about anything...I consider it carefully. When I was younger, I always ignored those "senses" and ended up wishing I hadn't. So yeah, I am not really superstitious, but if a black cat crossed my path and I got a bad vibe, I'd be watching my back.
2. What extremes have you heard of someone going to in the name of superstition? The sports teams in high school (with which I was only minimally involved, so the details on this are kinda sketchy) used to do nasty shit until a special game... Like wear the same socks, or not shave, or not wear deoderant. And we are talking for a series of like up to 10 games. I don't think that was superstition so much as it was for morale (although how your entire team being hairy and reeking makes you play better or be any more excited about it, I couldn't tell ya!)
3. Believer or not, what's your favorite superstition? Am I a bad daughter if I admit this? Step on a crack, break your mother's back... I used to jump up and down on them. :o/ Don't anymore. She has a horrible back and I don't believe I had anything to do with it (other than the messes I made as a kid, which she bent over to clean up, hence hurting her back) but it still makes me feel bad. And I don't know if this is superstition or what, but the whole, "If you make that face, and someone slaps you on the back, you'll stay that way, FOREVER!" I guess that belongs more on the list of "Things You Tell Little Shits to Scare Them." Right along with swallowed bubblegum staying in your stomach for 7 years... And maybe this was just me, but I thought if I ate an apple seed accidentally, a tree would grow in my stomach. Wow, this could be an interesting blog topic in and of itself!
4. Do you believe in luck? If yes, do you have a lucky number/article of clothing/ritual? I believe luck is something you draw to yourself. You're all gonna think I am crazy, but I believe there is a lot of power in positive thought and that the energy we put out draws the same to it, like a magnet... So if you are feeling lucky and positive, you are not guaranteed to be, but it's more likely... And yes, in terms of the lottery and the rule of averages and odds, I know this makes no sense, but neither does the notion of a bid dude sitting on a throne in the sky, so you keep your beliefs and I will keep mine. Anyway... I don't have any lucky items, but have always considered 37 to be my lucky number. It has popped up in my life constantly since I was around 14. So I guess that's not a good enough reason to consider it lucky ('cause no, it has never "brought me luck") but it just seems to always be around...
5. Do you believe in astrology? Why or why not? I didn't, until I realized that I am more or less the picture-perfect Taurus... I believe that the weekly astrology columns could have their star signs switched and the information meant for the Gemini would still make perfect sense to the Libra... It's all a way of presenting vague scenarios (which are almost 100% likely to happen) to someone and possibly influencing the way they respond to it. I mean, I could tell you you are going to meet a new person tomorrow and they are going to be trouble. Of course you're going to meet someone new (don't you almost every day?) but because I said it and it ends up happening - wow, magic! - you think you had better watch your back indeed. On the other hand, if you read that you'd meet someone new and they'd be the key to your financial success, you might spend the day needlessly kissing the ass of someone who, unless your horoscope said so, you would never even give the time of day. As far as the trait associated with astrological signs, I have to admit in my experience, they are usually dead on. I have been able to guess many peoples' signs the first time after knowing them for only a few minutes. My bottom line at least, is that there is weight in astrology, but most astrologists (ie. the column writers) get too specific with it. Your charts may show a period of family trouble coming your way, but they don't say who, in what way, how it's going to affect you, etc. That gets left up to the quacks.

So this is going to be a borderline-abusively long post. (As in, "My eyes, my eyes!") but I have read a few blogs this morning that make me kinda sad and I thought it was time the rant below be brought forth from the archives. I know it's a losing battle to try to get everyone online to behave like reasonable, stable adults, but that doesn't mean I can't be opinionated about it! I don't know what the story is (and I avoid drama with a 10-foot pole, so anyone who might think I am choosing "sides," I don't even know who you are, so cool it!), but I just thought maybe this would do some good to someone. Even if it's just by means of them being able to say, "Well at least someone knows how I feel..."

"Ok, so just forewarning you, this may become an offensive piece of writing. O'course, there's nothing I say that won't rub someone, somewhere the wrong way, so I guess we'll just have to bear that in mind and proceed with caution. If this makes you mad, you may be part of it. And if you know me at all, you are probably not.

Recently, I went on hiatus from my personal website for a slew of reasons, one of which being that because of recent events in my actual real life, I became less than comfortable about putting any kind of identifying info online... Historically I didn't think too much about it and just avoided the major no-nos, like phone number or address, specifics like that. Well, it dawned on me that with the name of the town in which I work, the name of the guy for whom I work, what I do, places I frequent, what kind of car I drive, where my dog goes to daycare... I would be very easy to find, were someone determined enough to do so. And as I said, recent events - which I will not go into details about - made me seriously rethink my personal security. So that's why I have been M.I.A., for anyone who cares.

And that brings me to the second point: who the fuck CARES? When my site was up, and this is also true of the handful of people I have met online who I would say I know well enough to call "friends," we just tend to squawk about our day, drop a few funny links and call it a nite. And that's all fine and good. I don't think - or need to think - I have groupies. There seem to be people who are delving into it a little too deeply - again, in my opinion. Like actually needing it, getting emotional about it, somehow ensnaring the emotions of others... And yeah yeah, some people are probably reading this and thinking I am referring to something or someone in particular (get over it!), but I truly mean this in the broadest sense. It freaks me out. How someone I have never met, might play my emotions, get money out of me, get devotion out of me, make me rearrange my life? Make me love them...? No chance. The more I am online, the more I surf, the more I have this fucking whacked cyberculture in my face... and I know, I am looking for it, it is not looking for me, and if I don't like it, don't do it - you don't have to tell me. I am just becoming more and more appalled by the egomaniacs, codependents, and lost little souls I encounter, people trashing each other online in this intangible soap operatic hooha every day, searching for some kind of... what is it? Popularity? Acceptance? Love? Admiration? Maybe I am oversimplifying, but there seem to be a lot of people who have given up trying to find these things in reality and have turned to the internet to satisfy their social needs. That just seems sad to me.

Cyberspace is fostering a whole melodrama that could never exist in actuality. Where else can people in every country in the world simultaneously throw insults at each other? Run smear campaigns and not have it be prosecutable as slander? Have hopelessly devoted "fans" and never have done one kind thing to earn any admiration? Be famous for nothing?

The internet community is starting to operate like a middle school or junior high - an endlessly immature succession of half-wit performances, scandals, and other shallow goings-on. I congratulate the people I know who run hooha-free sites - and you know who you are. I just don't want to be exposed it it anymore. Life is good. Being with real people is good. Being able to sit in front of someone, and have a beer, and actually speak is good."

So that was that rant... Take it as you will.

I have to go get a few things at the store and am then coming back here to do some henna. Yippee!! Hot diarrhea-like substance all in my hair!! *crazy pigeon eyes* Hey, does anyone know about CPE besides me? Do you watch Saturday Night Live? If anyone needs to know about CPE, lemme know. Jannie, I think it might be just your speed. Fucking damn funny shit!

Ta ta, cyberfriends. Have a lovely weekend! :o)

Posted @ 7:47 AM

Wednesday, February 11, 2004

Well hello all. Just haven't had much to say lately (I know, what's new?) so I haven't blogged... I did get an email I wanted to share (for anyone to whom I didn't email it). I know it's unlikely that anyone reading this might be looking to adopt a homeless animal, but I thought it was worth a shot.

"Free cat to a good home.
Anybody interested in a free cat??? My friend is looking for a good home for his cat. He said it's really
lovable and friendly, but his wife said the cat makes her nervous when it stares at her. She wants it out of the house. If you know of anyone, let me know. The picture is attached." freecat.jpg

I almost pissed my pants when I opened it. Have fun!! :o)

Posted @ 8:11 PM

Sunday, February 08, 2004

K, so I couldn't deal with the pink anymore. Kind of ironic that my Valentine's layout didn't even last until Valentine's Day. Oh, well. We all seem to be experiencing layout A.D.D. at present.

Please excuse some of the unfinished areas. I acidentally deleted my snippets page (bye bye, snippets) so I will have to come up with all new ones. I also haven't yet taken a pic of myself that I like or written the "me, summarized" for the top left hand column, and I need link buttons from y'all. I have one for Marc and the ladies of, but everyone else needs to get the lead out and make/send me one. And make no mistake, I am talking to Angela & Linda, Becca, Courtney, Girl, Inked and Jana, among others. So send dat shit dis way and be gentle with the comments on my half-assed layout. I just couldn't bear the pepto bismol for one more day, even if it was Jenna.

I think it's 'bout time I threw Indie in the tub. Maybe I will photograph the experience for you...'cause it's always an adventure. Hope everyone had a lovely weekend. :o)

Posted @ 1:28 PM

Thursday, February 05, 2004

I still have nothing really important to tell you, except that the thing I am psyched about is that after 6 months of begging, Dr. D is letting me do a website for the hospital. *huge smile* It's nowhere near completion yet, but I have been working hard! It looks really good so far. I say this somewhat grading on a curve. I know my HTML skills are not amazing, but if you do a search on animal hospital websites, most of them suck ass, so mine is awesome. :o) I will let you know when it's done.

Other than that, I have to share two things with you:

My response: *hysterical laughter*
Jay's response: "That is just wrong."

My response: "Must not have Ritalin in Iraq."
Jay's response: "Must not."

Hope everyone has a lovely Friday. :o)

Posted @ 6:27 PM

Tuesday, February 03, 2004

It's snowing (5-8" by tomorrow a.m.'s commute), Jay went to bed early, I have nothing to do, so I am going to bed. I'll try to blog soon, 'cause while it's not really technically exciting (ie. important to share), got somethin' new going on and it's kinda cool.

Hope everyone is having a good week so far. Blog to ya soon. :o)

Posted @ 8:36 PM

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